This is a short poem I wrote for my guardian angel. The sad truth is that I’m a dying person, suffering from HIV. Doctors don’t give too much time to live, and so receiving guidance from my guardian angel is my biggest hope.
I’ve Heard Stories of Angels Protecting People – I Want to Live.
I Want to Live More Life. I Think.
I want to read the books and clippings I’ve kept.
to have some tea overlooking the garden
I loved so hard over creating.
I want to play with the dog; and swim again.
to go on a canoe trip. and to go camping.
to travel. travel. travel.
journeys are my escape.
I Have No Fear of Death. I Embrace It . I Know
It Is My Soul Living on Its Path.
I’ve Heard Stories of Angels Protecting People. I Want to Use and Share and Enjoy the China
And Crystal and Linens I’ve Acquired.
What I Want Even More Is to Touch
The Shells and Stones and Seeds I Picked
To Paint. to Clean. to Tidy.
I Want to Look at All My Altars,
– the Chases; the Postcards and Letters I’ve Saved.
– my Prayers.
I Want to Live Again the Connections I Made,
The Warm Hearts and Smiles; Hot Romances.
Downright Cold Breezes on The Ships Bows I Stood
Upon — the Shores. the Sunsets.
I’ve Heard Stories of Angels Protecting People. I Want More Sunrises and Rocks to Climb.
I’d Like to Ride a Bicycle. Drive a Car.
Polish Wood. and Have Glass Shine.
I Want to Still Be the Kid on My Back
Looking and Looking and Looking
At the Stars;
The Aurora Borealis.
I Want to Touch Fabrics, and Wear Silks.
Crisp Cottons. Get Smartly Dressed;
Go out And Have a Ball.
Smell Animals and Grass and Flowers.
Lick Ice Cream. Eat Strawberries;
Crunch Rosemary Olive Oil Baguettes.
See a Movie. and A Play, and Go to The Proms.
I’ve Heard Stories of Angels Protecting People. I Want to Roam the Hills. and Sit on A Beach.
Dance; and Dance; and Dance.
I Want to Be Able to Be Sexual Again.
To See God/ess in All Things.
to be carried by Angels.
Loved — That’s It, Loved: L-O-V-E-D
To Be Held; and Holding.
I Don’t Want to Be Angry or Hurt or Rejected.
I Want No Knowledge of Violence or Injustice.
No Inhumanity. No Cruelty or Mean Hearts.
No Greed or Possessiveness.
I Don’t Want to Interfere
With Other People’s Choices.
I Am Ready to Go Any Time; but Not Yet
To Let Go of All This Life that Must Be Re-Lived.
I Want to Give and Do; and Make a Difference.
To Be at Peace, in Harmony and Oneness.
I Want to Heal Myself. and The Planet.
And so Very Many Innocents.
I Want to Sleep Now